In business and in life’s most random activities, one happens to negotiate quite often. Negotiation is an art that positive minds succeed easily. Although it may seem a bit strategically manipulative, it is absolutely not. Positive people are solution-oriented and ready to discuss and accept the change.
The issue at stake in negotiating is not necessarily showing off one’s knowledge but coming up with a deal that would suit each party and make the relationship evolve in a positive way.
Unless one is of a high expertise in a subject, chances of being wrong are always present. Experts themselves are always subject to self-evaluation and are constantly learning from others, from the even more experimented and from the much less experimented. The only party we can control is ourselves. We have no ability to control the other party, thus we do not know their reaction in advance. As such, staying genuine and not being afraid to say “I don’t know” will show respect and mindfulness.
The key to succeeding in any negotiating task is to be ready for it and to prepare it. Preparation is the main part of the homework. Having a positive, open mind is also important and helps showing goodwill to the person or group one is dealing with. When one is ready for a discussion and has their answers already planned and studied, negotiation goes very well and its output is very satisfying.
Showing to the other negotiator that you are confident and that you know what you are talking about will build trust and ease. However, too much confidence leads to a certain arrogance that may have a negative interpretation and make you lose a good opportunity of growth. There is no bigger turn-off than a negotiator who claims knowing everything about everything. It is seen as a clear sign of pedantism. Noone knows everything, ever. There is always someone more expert and more capable of giving better answers. The ultimate way to go is to accept the debate with a decent and humble way. Not only the other party will appreciate it, but it will also show your lenient and flexible side.
The main purpose of any deal is not to prove one is always right. The main purpose of a deal is the make the deal work and be productive.
As a deal maker or as a mother, a woman is always faced with situations where she would have to negotiate. Negotiation skills can be honed at home as well simply because the toughest dealmakers are children. What makes children tough negotiators is their weakness in a subject or in another. And what triggers their weakness is their lack of knowledge. Explaining to a child who has absolutely no knowledge about macronutients or daily fiber intake that eating salad is better than having a Kinder Délice is no easy task. However, settling goals together and rewarding the child everytime a milestone is reached can go a long way. This way, the task of making the child eat the salad and making a habit out of it will be confirmed and on the other hand, he or she will have their Kinder Délice.
I personally like face-to-face negotiations. They show a genuine attitude and a straightforward aspect of my personality. Negotiating via email gives the weaker party the opportunity to look for weak and unstable justifications and craft them. Having a direct link and speaking face-to-face, in any situation, not only creates a good communication, but also builds trust and connection.
Have you ever received a phone call from your child asking if they can have an extra ice cream pot or go outside with a friend without a trusted guardian? If your answer to your child was: “let me come home and discuss this”, you totally get what I am saying.